As much as I hate to say it, I am currently engaged in a love affair. Said affair takes hours away from time I could be spending with my lovely boyfriend, minimizes my work ethic at my office desk, and distracts me from doing everyday mundane tasks.
Before the “Holier Than Thou” crowd butts in, let me mention, this disloyalty is due to none other than one of the hottest website and app combinations on the market right now: Pinterest.
Though I might be a little late to the pinning craze that swept the nation, let me say my piece. From the day it thrust itself onto women’s iPhones everything, Pinterest has been helping ladies plan weddings to men they have never met, look up recipes to every baked good imaginable, and even construct a virtual wardrobe.
So… What’s the problem? I can think of seven to be exact.
1. I can TOTALLY afford that
Okay Pre-Madonna, I get it. Pinterest is, in theory, pretty great inspiration when it comes to the current trends of the female wardrobe. It is, however, so discouraging, when you click on the pin only to find out that the “cheap” bathing suit of the summer, is actually $600. Don’t even get me started on the array of Christian Louboutins, Versace dresses, and 100% gold jewelry that is inescapable in the Pinterest World. Sorry to break it to you honey, but your college allowance probably isn’t going to cover the patent leather works of Manolo Blahnik. To quote one of the greatest movies of my generation, “Help me! I’m poor!”
2. SuperWedding
As much as I would LOVE a dove to delicately place the ring on my finger, I highly doubt it is going to happen. All it takes is one perfectly stitched Vera Wang and BOOM another one bites the dust. I get it, planning a wedding is hard. Or at least it appears that way on TV. But for single, twenty-something young women that have a better relationship with the pizza delivery boy than an actual potential suitor (Houston, we have a problem!), wasting hours planning a wedding that frankly, is far to unrealistic to ever be executed the way Pinterest portrays, is sad…and a big waste of time. Go out and have a girls night, maybe you’ll meet a guy, maybe you won’t. But I can assure you; you aren’t going to find him on Pinterest.
3. Of course my hairdresser can make my hair look like that picture!
This one hits home for me. I hate my hair. Its think and long and overall a mess. Hair and beauty is my biggest go to on the P. It is full of lovely women with lovely hair. Sadly, my hairdresser cannot look at a picture and instantaneously produce a short, thin, light, layered to perfection hairstyle. I leave the salon sad, disappointed, and searching once again for my Pinterest Perfect hairstyle. ** This theory can also be applied to: “messy buns”, highlights, cuts, ponys, “easy” updos, etc.
4. I hate working out, but pinning about it will for sure motivate me
It is a grand contradiction. In order to be totally prepared for my workout, I will look up all things pertaining to working out on Pinterest. Workout clothes, high intensity work outs, cardio tips, the right kind of running shoes, how to look like I had a crazy hard work out, perfect work out songs, what to do after a work out, what to do before a work out, the list goes on and on. But how many of us actually put these things into action? Better yet, how many of us end up skipping the gym, sitting on the couch with yoga pants on and rewatching the first season of Orange is the New Black in its entirety??
5. Did you see the Quote I pinned? My theology is spot on!
Just…stop.
6. If my fictitious home doesn’t have an invisible staircase that spits out candy, I might flip out.
Exaggeration? Yes, but not by much. As much as it pains me to say so, we simply cannot all have the Carrie Bradshaw Dream Closet. Mr. Big isn’t going to buy you a Heaven on 5th Penthouse anytime soon. Riddle me this: why does one need a chalkboard with “Laundry” written on it in the laundry room? I think the washer and dryer paired with the mound of clothes gives it away. Also, an Olympic sized infinity pool is likely impossible when you live in a small sub division on a quarter acre lot. Sorry.
7. I can’t cook, but Pinterest said it was the easiest from scratch, gluten free, vegan, organic, healthy chocolate brownies to make like ever.
I admire those that eat well. I go through my stages were I swear I am going to get super healthy. I have done paleo, I have done gluten free, and I have been vegetarian. The P has been a great outlet for research and shines like on great recipes. I can honestly say, however, that my ratio of pins of successful meals to successful meals is about 100:1, and that is being kind. Pinterest is also a plethora of delicious, tempting, and 3000-calorie desserts. I don’t care what you say, your avocado brownie has nothing on my triple chocolate cheesecake.
So…what now? I love Pinterest. And sadly, I am guilty of almost, if not all, of these offenses. It just pisses me off sometime. It is a great resource and awesome to look at while on delay at the airport or when you should be studying. Don’t, however, let a pin, or someone else’s “One Day” board, create in you a false reality. I will continue to Pin, as I’m sure you will as well. Just pin with a grain of salt.
Up in the Air 